True Politeness
by Archbishop Fulton J. Sheen
The politeness of respectability in the condescension of a conscious superior to an inferior; the “politeness” of a classless society is the elimination of those above the contrary, is that “each of you have the humility to think others better men than himself, and study the welfare of others, not his own.” This secret of courtesy was given by Paul to the Philippians.
But why should the superior consider himself as inferior to others? First, because we can always know the worst about ourselves, but we can only guess the worst in our neighbor. Since we are certain of our failings, but uncertain of the failings of others, we should treat them with great respect. Though we may be “superior” to others in education, wealth, and prestige, they may be above us in virtue. Furthermore, if they had been given our graces and opportunities, they might have been a thousand times nobler than ourselves. As children of God, we must not await love to be loving; we must project love where we do not find it and thus make others lovable.
This is the kind of love that parents feel for children, not counting whether they are smart or beautiful, but just because they are. The family is the one place in the world where one is valued, not because of what one earns or because of what ones prestige, but simply because one has existence. Parental love is because of what is in the parents, and not what is in the children. The newborn babe has neither thought nor love, nor power, nor self expression, and yet the mother loves it with a love that is akin to the love of life itself.
All this is a reflection of the love that is in God, who sympathizes with things at their lowest level. Such is the love that we must bear to the people if Asia and Africa and Oceania, who have not our advantages. They are loved by God, and therefore we must love them, regardless of who they are. It is easy enough to love those who love us, but Our Lord said “What reward is there in this?” We have to put love where we do not find it…even in our enemies. That is how we prove the love of God in us. Earthworms are uncomfortable companions for angels; moles are unhappy creatures for eagles; yet love made the Savior bear society of of ignorant and carnal followers.
Courtesy of this kind is the best taught by example, rather than precept. The night of the Last Supper, Our Lord, who was a King, acted as a servant; He was Master but he conducted himself as a disciple; He was the Alpha or First, but He knelt before His inferiors as if He were the least and the last. The Gospel tells us, “Jesus knew full well that the Father had lest everything in His hands, knew it was from God that He came, and to God that he went. And now, rising from the supper, He laid His garments aside, took a towel, and put it about Him; and then He poured water into the basin and began to wash the feet of His disciples, wiping them with a towel that girded Him.” The deepest act of humility is not inconsistent with dignity. If He had not done this humble act, we would never have known there was such compassion in Heaven. Humility goes to God because it comes from God.
The feet of the Apostles were covered with dust from their walk over dusty roads from Bethany to Jerusalem. To wash feet was the work of slaves. The group about the table is startled by the disturbance in the order of the meal. With hushed wonder and open-lipped expectation, they see Him rise from the table, in His garments-wondering what He will do next.
The very words used to describe the story of why God became man: “Rising from the supper,” i.e leaving the Bosom of the Father and Heaven itself. “Laid aside His garment.” Though He is God, He lays aside the glory of his Divinity and empties Himself. “Took a towel and put it about Him.” Taking upon Himself our human nature, He appeared in the form and the likeness of men, the towel being the mark of the servant. “Poured water into a basin,” i.e poured out the laver of regeneration. “Washing and wiping,” he cleans that which was foul in our capture and makes us clean again in the sight of God.
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